big mo why starting and stopping is self sabotage

Alright, enough with this starting and stopping. Enough with every year making the same resolutions, over and over again. ENOUGH. You have to get mad. As Dave Ramsey says, you have to get sick and tired of being sick and tired. Give this starting and stopping a rest. We are not a tree. We are not stationary. Every time you stop and start again, you are not just picking up where you left off. You are losing covered ground.

When you’re doing all the right things. Every day you are consistently working towards getting better at your goal. Maybe you trip up one day, but you continue on. You don’t stop. You’ll find you’ll meet this guy I know called Big Mo. Big Mo is the momentum you build by sticking with your plan, with your meal plan, with your goals. This guy is on your side and he only shows up when you stay consistent at your goals. Big Mo is a force to be reckoned with.

He’ll inspire you and bring about an abundance of opportunity and success. The more you keep at it, the stronger he gets, and the stronger you get. Every day you push play on your workout, you write those 500 words towards your novel, you refrain from unnecessary spending, whatever it is you’re shooting for, you take one step forward every single day.

Here’s what happens when you stop.

Big Mo get’s a little smaller on the first day. So this one thing comes up and you choose to put your goals on hold. Because it’s ok, you’ll just pick back up right where you left off right? Wrong. Another day, another missed opportunity. Every day your body gets weaker, that creative writing roll you were on loses focus and you forget why you had a no-spend-month goal in the first place and order pizza because it’s Friday. A week goes by, maybe another. Big Mo is nowhere to be found. You decide the break is over, time to reboot those goals you were working on. Well, guess what. It’s harder now.

Those workouts you were crushing last month feel like the first day all over again. You can notice a difference in how you’ve let your nutrition go and how much less energy you have. That novel you were working on requires a read through to remember where you left off. You seem to have forgotten the train of thought you were on and what you were planning next. A waste of precious time. You check your bank account to do your budget again and realize you went over on the ‘eating out’ category by… a lot.

Those are all hypothetical, but they’re very much the truth. See, while you were taking a break, you were taking steps backward. We are not a tree, we are not stationary. We move and flow with life in this weird endless tango.

You may have forgotten what Big Mo looks like, and that’s ok. He’s always a couple days away from showing up. You just have to start, and not stop. No matter what, no matter why.

Sometimes Quitting is the answer.

Now let’s be clear. Some things are not meant to be forever. You have to have a heart to heart conversation with yourself and ask yourself if all this starting and stopping is because of a lack of focus or a lack of PASSION. Once you’ve lost the passion, and you feel like you should go separate ways with what once was your goal, then be honest and ask yourself the hard questions. Don’t keep adding a task to your to do list just because you feel you SHOULD. You need to WANT it. With all of yourself. So keep your chin up. People say winners never quit. But they do quit, all the time. They quit doing things that are not getting them to their goal. And they recalculate often, always ensuring they are headed to where they want to be.

Love, always

Mariangelica

 

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Do you have a car payment? A line of credit? A mortgage? Do you have student loans? If you said yes to any of those questions, this post is written specifically for you.

I can’t figure out when or how I came across Dave Ramsey, but I am so grateful I did. Dave is the voice of debt repayment. Every day for three hours a day he hosts a radio show that is broadcasted live on youtube, facebook and is later offered as a podcast anywhere you listen to your favourite podcasts. He teaches millions of people how to get out of debt and how to be debt free. By following Dave Ramsey’s baby steps it is possible for anyone to become debt free. The hubs and I are on his plan and are currently on Baby Step 2 and crushing our goals hard.

So why should I worry about debt? I make my monthly minimum payments, I’ve never been late on a payment and my credit score is awesome.

Well, with most debt, the longer you have it the more money you throw away in interest payments. Banks WANT your money, and interest is their bread and butter. As Dave says, your greatest wealth building tool is your INCOME, and debt makes this number lower the more you owe! Imagine having no car payments, imagine keeping all the money you make? Yeah, it’s possible, and the Dave Ramsey Baby Steps will get you there.

Baby Step 1: $1,000 to Start an Emergency Fund

Sell anything that isn’t attached to the floor, make a budget and cut back on expenses. Save the $1000 as FAST as you can. If you already have a savings account, take everything out of it and leave $1000 in it and put all the rest to your debt. The idea for this fund is that it’s an EMERGENCY fund. A birthday is not an emergency, because you knew it was coming up. With this in the bank you won’t have to go into debt if something were to happen.

Baby Step 2: Pay Off All Debt but the House

List all your debts from the littlest one to the biggest one and list your monthly minimums. Every month, make a new budget with your partner and attack that little debt with a vengeance! Throw every last dollar you can at the little one until you pay it off. When you do, take all the extra money you were putting towards the debt AND the minimum payment you were making and add it to what you pay to the second debt on the list! This is his snowball method and the idea is that the motivation of knocking off the small debts will inspire you to keep going while freeing up more money to pay off the larger debts!

Baby Step 3: 3 to 6 Months of Expenses in Savings

Now you are debt free! Congratulations!! Time to build your emergency fund to a full fund. This means, add up all your expenses for the month. Mortgage, food, utilities, insurance etc and multiply that number by how many months you want to save. He recommends 3-6 month’s worth. Now this is your new savings goal! This will allow you to be prepared were life to throw a huge wrench your way. This and all his steps are also available on his website.

Baby Step 4: Invest 15% of Household Income Into Retirement

Now that you have no payments and a fully funded emergency fund, time to make that money work for you. Invest!! Take 15% of your gross household income and invest it into a Tax Free Savings account, your work’s matching RRSP etc. Remember, time is of the essence and you will benefit from compound interest when it comes to this step. Stay consistent and soon you will be a millionaire. It’s just math!

Baby Step 5: College Funding for Children

Now that your future is taken care of thanks to investing it’s time to start saving for your kid’s post secondary education! The Canadian government has something called the RESP and by contributing to it the government matches 20% of your contributions up to $500 a year. (aka, free money!) This is a great way to start saving for your child’s education.

Baby Step 6: Pay Off Home Early

Now, there’s just one more debt standing between you and a truly debt free lifestyle. Can you imagine not having a mortgage payment?! I’m freaking out over here just thinking about it! Any extra money you put towards your mortgage is going to shave off so much interest and so many years off your mortgage! This is a huge one, and usually, especially in Canada, we don’t often find mortgages for 80 or 90k like our neighbours to the south do, so our debt here is quite large. Just keep at it. You have no payments, your life is well set up after following all the baby steps, so enjoy your money while paying down your house faster!

Baby Step 7: Build Wealth and Give

Max out your RRSP and TFSA investment contributions per year, and have FUN. As Dave says, you live like no one else so that later you can live and give like no one else. Become incredibly generous, and do whatever you want. You have done so well. Congratulations!

All the baby steps and more on the entire idea behind Dave’s plan, including his own personal story, is detailed in his book the Total Money Makeover, which I could NOT recommend more. I actually wrote about My Top 5 Personal Development books and you better believe this was on that list!

Best of luck on your journey. Are you following his plan? What baby step are you on?

 

 


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5 Favourite Personal Development Books

I like to read. Though, I scrunched up my nose when I was younger at the idea of reading non-fiction books. I just thought if it wasn’t fiction it was an autobiography and I didn’t care about real people. I cared about wizards and Hogwarts and Hagrid… yes, I basically only read the Harry Potter Books on replay. Every time I picked up a fiction novel I’d start it and endlessly compare it to J.K. Rowling’s way of writing and the story and I always made my way back to re-reading my beloved series. I still have yet to read a biography but I have a couple on my list of books I want to read.

Personal Development books weren’t even on my radar. But when they got on my radar… girl you better believe I read them all. (Well not all, but I’m getting close, haha) I have gained SO much from reading personal development books and I have compiled a list of my ultimate top 5. The 5 that have changed my life in some way, taught me lots and pushed me forward, closer to my goals.

I read Personal Development books with a highlighter in hand. Gasp! You mark up your books? YES. Personal Development books are TOOLS. And as such, they should be used and abused. I dog-ear and highlight like nobody’s business because when I don’t, I have to re-read the whole book to remind myself of what I’ve learned. When key pieces of information are highlighted you can skim through a book you’ve read and quickly point out what you felt was worth remembering. Say you were studying for an exam (a life event) and you had your textbook full of information (personal development book). You wouldn’t want to aimlessly search the textbook for answers, you’d want your notes clear and jumping out at you, that’s the goal.

Also, I’m a quote lover, hence the highlighting, so I have also included some of my favourite quotes from each. The best part about it is there isn’t a book over $15 on the list, so it’s not going to break the bank either, and they have been some of the greatest investments I’ve made recently.

The Slight Edgethe slight edge

This book is just awesome. It kicks you in the butt and gets you into high gear that’s for sure. It awakens that lion inside of you that WANTS that goal real bad. It makes you question what you do every day and reassess your priorities. It shines a light on your procrastination and guides your focus to the right places.

Favourite Quotes:

♥ “Successful people do what unsuccessful people are not willing to do.”

♥ “The truth is, what you do matters. What you do today matters. What you do every day matters. Successful people just do the things that seem to make no difference in the act of doing them and they do them over and over and over until the compound effect kicks in.”

♥ “The journey starts with a single step—not with thinking about taking a step.”

♥ “Instead of writing down what you’re going to do (chances are you’ve been doing that your whole adult life anyway, and it doesn’t make you any better at doing them), write down at the end of the day what you did do that day.”

You are a Badassyou are a badass

Man, how I love this personal development book. It’s like having that person in your corner telling you that you can do it! Jen Sincero writes like a friend in your living room. She tells it how it is, a wonderful blend of life experiences and client stories. There are so many points to think about in here. Seriously it’s hard to not highlight entire paragraphs, I highly recommend this if you’re in the need of a reminder that you CAN do it and that the Universe has your back! You CAN live an amazing life. Energy is real y’all. read this book to find out how to use energy to your advantage.

Favourite Quotes:

♥ “You are loved. Massively. Ferociously. Unconditionally. The Universe is totally freaking out about how awesome you are. It’s got you wrapped in a warm gorilla hug of adoration. It wants to give you everything you desire. It wants you to be happy. It wants you to see what it sees in you.”

♥ “You are responsible for what you say and do. You are not responsible for whether or not people freak out about it.”

♥ “If you’re serious about changing your life, you’ll find a way. If you’re not, you’ll find an excuse.”

♥ “Because if you base your self-worth on what everyone else thinks of you, you hand all your power over to other people and become dependent on a source outside of yourself for validation. Then you wind up chasing after something you have no control over, and should that something suddenly place its focus somewhere else, or change its mind and decide you’re no longer very interesting, you end up with a full-blown identity crisis.”

7 habits of highly effective peopleThe 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

Personal Development hits full steam with this book. There is some serious information in here. This one comes from a recommendation from an old manager and I’m so grateful I got a chance to read it. It’s really insightful and does make you look at yourself a little differently. There are some real action items in this book, so if you’re looking for fluffy PD, this is not the book for you. But if you’re looking for a super clear guide you can start implementing now then this is the book!

Favourite Quotes:

♥ “But until a person can say deeply and honestly, “I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday,” that person cannot say, “I choose otherwise.”

♥ “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”

♥ “Two people can see the same thing, disagree, and yet both be right. It’s not logical; it’s psychological.”

♥ “It’s not what happens to us, but our response to what happens to us that hurts us.”

the compound effect The Compound Effect

This is the first Personal Development book I read. A few dozen boss babes in my network read it, and it was so eye-opening. This is the book that hooked me into PD forever. To me, learning from books was restricted to school’s textbooks and that they were boring, real boring. I used to read to escape reality and jump into magical worlds but now I love reading to learn, so that I can take a hold of my reality and immerse myself in making it work for me every day!

Favourite Quotes:

♥ “You will never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine.”

♥ “It’s not the big things that add up in the end; it’s the hundreds, thousands, or millions of little things that separate the ordinary from the extraordinary.”

♥ “Forget about willpower. It’s time for why-power. Your choices are only meaningful when you connect them to your desires and dreams. The wisest and most motivating choices are the ones aligned with that which you identify as your purpose, your core self, and your highest values. You’ve got to want something, and know why you want it, or you’ll end up giving up too easily.”

total money makeoverTotal Money Makeover

Oh Dave Ramsey. This guy, all I can say is I’m obsessed. If you owe anyone any money, you need this book. Credit cards? Loans? Car Payments? Student loans? A mortgage? Everyone in the world needs to read this book. Get out of debt. Get Gazelle intense and just knock it out and give yourself a raise by doing just that! Sve for retirement, pay off your home way early. Pay cash for everything, and never use a credit card again. He goes over 7 baby steps that are honestly so simple you’ll be looking around thinking you’re getting pranked. Yes, it’s THAT simple.

Favourite Quotes:

♥ “We buy things we don’t need with money we don’t have to impress people we don’t like.”

♥ “You must walk to the beat of a different drummer. The same beat that the wealthy hear. If the beat sounds normal, evacuate the dance floor immediately! The goal is to not be normal, because as my radio listeners know, normal is broke.”

♥ “The enemy of “the best” is not “the worst.” The enemy of “the best” is “just fine.”

♥ “You have to live like no one else so that then you can live and give like no one else”

I hope you enjoy the list, and that you pick one of these great reads up, do it and see how your life changes!

Love,

Mariangelica

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